venting…

Yesterday we were suppoae to kick it but then you told me you had practice when i stepped out the house. I curled my hair for you too for nothing so i decided to go to your practice cause i really wantedto see you.. Yeaah, i didnt get to talk to you as much cause you were busy but at least i got to see you.. after pracitce i said hi the only words you said was ’ what you do with alex at the park?’ like wth? NOTHING. you dont even believe me, no trust at all.. you dragged me in the store & you got people texting me asking if i was okay and why you treated me that way..Yeah not right but whatever.. Jealousy is causing all of this, maybe.. you dont open up to me anymore.. never tell me anything or whatever..its like you dont give a fuck anymore. I’ve been calling you leaving you i/ms & no sign of you.. you’ve been avoiding these past few days idk why but i guess.. im just not used to us not talking. i miss you a lot right now.. idk what the hell i did to you, but i know i didnt do anything wrong. if you want space why cant you just tell me? instead of leaving me here in one spot, speechless.. yeah, i need you right here with me im so incomplete idk what to do without you.. babe, i miss you so much.. =( whats going on with you? i wanna talk this out.. you tell me nothings wrong but why you avoiding me? not even talking to me one bit.. not even hi or anything.. i confused about everything your doing.. seriously though.. im just.. just very attached to you that i cant go a day not talking to you not even minutes.. its hurts to know that you cant trust me not as much as i trust you.. you make it seem like im nothing to you like you can take 100 days not talking or seeing me.. i’ve done so much sacrifices for you and i feel like this is what i get.. not fair at all, but babe its okay, i guess i’ll be fine.. i’ll just be waiting… cus at the end i know that im not the one giving up. i mean back then people would call me desperate & shit but i dont care what people say and if i did then i wouldnt be here i’d be over there doing what they wanted me to do.. i believe in the saying that ’ if you love someone you’d do anything just for them ’ yeah.. that’s me, girl who’s just really in love with a guy and ont give a fuck about what people says.. all cause of you. whatever though babe.. i love you that’s all you need to know… i’ve already shown you, gave you.. im physically&emotionally hurt right now.. i put myself into situations i know i cant handle & i complain but then i know i shouldnt right? cus i out myself here. & i give and show you things you dont ask for why? cus just the way i am, im just really in love.. cant blame a girl. i’ve never felt like this, i know your not the only one but your my first love. yeah i’ll let everyone hate its fine i dont care. all i care is about is you and me.. hope you talk to me soon.. i really don’t get you though.. i miss & love my boyfriend Sheeen Paznuts. febuary4,08 alway’s&forever no doubt